Letting go can be one of the hardest things to do, no matter the circumstance. In an unsuspecting place, I found inspiring words towards letting go. In hopes to get motivation for my running and connect with my father, I started reading Chris Lear’s “Running with the Buffaloes” a few weeks ago. But on a plane, over Europe somewhere I read a section that sparked a light inside of me. There is a section when the team is dealing with a loss and the following quote is said “we can remember and honor Chris, we can let him go, and we can keep him, no doubt about it.”
I know I struggle with letting go in many aspects in life. Letting go of a bad run. Letting go of pain or hurt. Letting go of someone I lost. Letting go of the past. I tend to see letting go as giving up or even worse, forgetting. But that isn’t what it has to be about, it’s about letting it/them go yet keeping them.
Think about it, when you are learning to ride a bike, eventually your parents let go. It’s not always when you are ready either, but they do it because they know you can. You must trust yourself that letting go puts you in a better place, not worse.
Letting go when it comes to running
I need to be honest with myself. I am not in marathon condition anymore, I am not in college athlete mode. However, both things were in the past and a lot has happened in the meantime. I need to let go of how it used to be and come to the present to what I am able to do now. Training is not about PRs and speed work outs anymore it’s more about making running a natural part of my day again. Returning to a place where not running makes a bad day. Eventually the rest will fall into play. I need to trust myself, my legs and everything my father taught me.
Letting go when it comes to grief
Now this, this is harder. It’s been almost 22 months since I lost my dad but feels like yesterday. And I know I haven’t let go. Letting go to me has meant forgetting him and moving past his loss. But as one of the CU cross country men said, you can let go and you can keep them. So I need to keep my father in my heart, in my actions and in my purpose. I need to trust myself that letting go is the best thing I do for myself. “Letting go is hard, but sometimes holding on is harder.”
So, I am not only challenging myself, but anyone else to let go. To break free from what every thoughts or things you’ve been holding onto, which in turn hold you down. Let go. Let go and know you are not giving up, you are not forgetting. All you are doing is allowing yourself to continue.
Love for Laces 